Friday, December 18, 2009

burning questions

last night i got mad at a picture.

this picture:

it was mocking me and my inability to recognize a joke. all i was trying to do was browse a few real estate listings (on a legit site) and then i saw this piece of work. i instantly felt self-conscious, 'am i the only moron who can't tell what the fuck this is about?'

reading further into the ad did not resolve any questions i had.

is someone seriously trying to sell this house? what is the entire fire department doing posing for a picture in front of a burning house? exactly how long ago was thomas edison's time? just how bad is the fire damage? who can i rob to get 55k cash?

et cetera, et cetera.

i was going to print out the picture and burn it just to make it feel stupid too, but then i figured it might be the type of picture that likes that kind of thing. and also because i might end up burning down my current home and wind up in a lunatic asylum perpetually mumbling something about fire and cash offers.

on that note, fuck you, picture. you and your weird fire scenario are no longer going to bother me, unless you want to play nice and tell me what the fuck you're all about. then i'll invite you over for tea and we can chat about property lines and vinyl siding.


PorkStar said...

The picture is actually a little bit tasteless, if you ask me... I don't really see the joke either.

PorkStar said...

however, remember that if you end up in the lunatic asylum it may not be only because of the burning house but also because of the evil horse and the witches crackling you hear from animals in your backyard.. namely them fucking squirrels.

PorkStar said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
mo.stoneskin said...

I'm just glad you've found closure on the whole thing.

Kurt said...

You sure taught that stuck-up picture what's what!

j-face said...

it's been a while and i've missed you and your word fucks. hi lana.