Tuesday, May 5, 2009

i'll translate if i have to

i'm not sure if it's a matter of my age or my lack of proper training, but i am completely illiterate when it comes to chat/text speak. sure i can send texts and chats, but it will take me about five years for one message because i type the whole entire thing out.

some of the basics are easy and i've picked up on their proper usage; omg, wtf, got it. others however, make me annoyed because i took fucking six years of latin and i was so proficient i could converse with cicero if i wanted to, and yet i still don't know what the fuck 'rofl' means.

the frustrating part about this was that when i received a chat from someone who used this term, my first impulse was to google it. i stopped because i realized that i have no idea what rofl could possibly mean, and the last thing i need is to google some weird porno term and have dirty things pop up on my computer and never ever leave (cause that's what i heard happens when you look up online porn).

so my next move was to email the human dictionary that is kristine for a quick answer:

me: don't burn me up, but i really don't know what 'rofl' means

k: ok, first, tell whoever used it that he/she is a tool. second, it means 'rolling on the floor, laughing'.

that's the dumbest shit i've ever heard. shouldn't all laughter at something written be covered by the all-encompassing 'lol'?

ok, i'm already over it. now i can talk about how much i love microsoft paint.

the amazingly awesome sour sent me this fabulous shirt as a trade for my wack bird shirt.

right away, you can see the sweet sunshine lines i made coming off the shirt, which could be perceived to be stink lines, except that i'm telling you they're not. i can't decide what my favorite part of the shirt is. it could be that the pat of butter melting onto pancake stack's right eye totally looks like a black eye, making him that much more badass. or it could be this:

who's trapped under stack? how did he get stuck there? what was he looking for? so many questions, it's brilliant. so a HUGE THANKS to sour, for spreading her canadian love my way!

i could take pictures and paint things on them all day, but in truth, i'd never become as talented as this. you're welcome for the link. and now, feel free to da mihi multi baccii please.


Kristine said...

Holy Latin! That's even sweeter than my Pain skills! Don't even tell me if you knew that from memory or what. Because I can't remember shit from that class. Instead I know what ROFL means :)

You need to check out mjenks' blog. He's a Latin dude.

Kristine said...

1. Don't lie, you love the porn.
2. I totally knew those were sunshine lines. You're that good.
3. I want that t-shirt!

Miss Yvonne said...

I think maybe it's the pancake stack that is saying help...because it knows you are about to eat it.


Also...six years of Latin??? Amazing.

miss. chief said...

FINALLY. sorry it took so long to get there. also, HI this is my brand new alter-ego
it's sort of a secret
you know, i didn't even notice the "help" until i was mailing it away to you! i was like "oh great, it's dirty....wait a minute"
and the latin...that's awesome. i want to learn it but really i have no reason to at all.

Lana said...

k- of COURSE that's from memory. and who doesn't love porn? i just hate all the creepy computer viruses that come with it. maybe i'll let you borrow mr. badass pancake stack someday, if you give me one of your cool awards.

miss yvonne- it could be, i can grill on some pancakes! and yes, salve mi amici!!

miss.chief- thanks for the drawing of your cat's fat tummy. i thought about posting that but i want to be selfish and keep it to myself :) learning latin is it's own reward, i promise. i'd teach you but i forgot most of what i knew (reciting in head amo, amas, amant,...)

Lana said...

and i'm so anal i have to correct that last line: (amo, amas, amat...)

i know, i'm sick

Kristine said...

"Uhhmm...take the next sentence please...uh...uh...Lana."

quibus quibus quibus
quorum quarum quorum

That's all I've got.

Bridget said...

yay! you got the pancake shirt!

Sally-Sal said...

maybe the pancakes escaped from the pancake mafia, and they need a place to hide...

Skitch said...

Weird that you mention Cicero...I'm reading a bio on him right now.

I think he rofl-ed many times when orating.

Personally, I abhor those abbreviations. I try to type everything out. I find that it really cuts my text conversations short since no one wants to read all that!

Which is my goal in the first place...not to really have to talk to many people. ;)

Brian said...

OMG, I'm ROTFL'ing right now BTW, IDK, it's just your post makes me LOL.

Lana said...

k- i almost rofled at your comment, nice work!

bridget- i'm gonna rock that piece at the next family picnic, wait for it :)

sally- makes sense, i've been known to harbor fugitives from time to time

skitch- oh silly cicero, what would you text to him if you could?

b- i expect a translation on my desk by this afternoon

the iNDefatigable mjenks said...

I thought Rolf was that dog who played piano.